Experiences thru the years….

I am not an expert when it comes to relationships ( whether it be personal or friendship) but I can only share my own in hopes others will learn that there are some people worth fighting for and some worth letting go. There is a difference between the relationships you have as a teenager verses the adult. I am in no way a bitter woman or even bashing men period!! I am honest and shooting straight from the hip! The people listed here be will some good, bad and what I learned from them…even some funny stuff!! Enjoy 🙂

Teenage Years

Mr. Chocolate Wonder –  this one I met and dated from 12 to about 14 and was actually the first chocolate brotha I ever dated. We were young and of course thought we were going to be together forever but it sucked because we lived in 2 different states. At that time there was no skype, facebook, myspace..there was ole fashion putting paper to pen and writing!! I knew that I cared about him and he cared about me but eventually he chose someone else…I would say someone of a smaller frame ( yes I am thick and proud of it now!) He only liked being seen with me when we were alone and God forbid we were seen in front of his friends he would pretend he didn’t know me.  I cut that off as a lose and moved on! Positive note: he had a smile on him that reminded me of the crest commercial. We are still friends to this day but ole homeboy got like 5 kids. What I learned: puppy love is very cute but it never last long!

Mr.Greasy Spoon-  this one I cant help but to laugh because at times that is exactly what he looks like! I would say he was my first love and the first one to ever break my heart. It’s sad when you love someone and they can’t love you back the way you. I don’t have too many fond memories because I can only remember the hurt that he caused and he wanted to be too much like someone else. I learned so much from this experience and I felt what it was like to really hate someone. Yea, yea, yea I know hate is such a strong word but hey that is exactly how I felt! Positive: he showed me exactly what I didn’t want in a person!

Mr. All-in-one-Package- I can honestly say that this person was my high school sweetheart! He liked me from the first moment he saw ( I only know this because he told me!) He made such an impact that I am still friends with him until this very day and he is always someone that I can call on! He taught me so much about what it is for a guy to really care and be with someone regardless of whatever is going on. He is actually the first guy to accept me for me and never tried to change me. If he ever asked me to marry now I would say yes because I know him and he knows me 🙂

Mr. 1 Inch Wonder – not much can be said about this person except for the nickname I provided. Hey I am just being honest. One thing is for certain don’t talk about your “stuff” if you cant back it up!! That’s all I am saying…the end!

Mr. Smile- this person I hold near and dear to my heart because he is and will always be a special guy! He has one the best smiles I have seen in a very long time and has a heart of gold. Did we ever date?…no and that’s only because I valued his friendship way too much and to be honest he just wasn’t my type. I rather tell the truth than comfort someone with a lie. He is still someone I can count and he is still my friend.

Mr. E.- this person basically came out of nowhere and we instantly connected. There was certain things that I wanted to do and he as well but we could never manage to get on the same page. end result, he went his way as I did. Good thing is he saw the value that was in me and I believe he appreciates it more now than ever. We are still really good friends but his personal life has changed and I am thrilled for him. Positive: we had some really good times together and never a dull moment 🙂

Mr. Usher – well yea that name sums it up..he really did favor Usher…I swear! This dude was the “new guy” in school and every girl wanted to talk to him. Me I could really careless about who he was and where he was from. All I know is that he liked to showboat around in high school and ran track. It happened that he needed a tutor English..yup you guessed it I was that person my teacher who volunteered my services ( I was mad as hell!) I didn’t like him because of how cocky he was and he came off as arrogant. Needless to say we both fell for each other and dated was VERY BRIEF!!! Funny how rumors start and I was so busy with school and sports I didn’t have time to acknowledge it and the rumor was pretty hilarious if you ask me! The end result…I cut him off quick ( yup I am a Taurus!) and proceeded to ignore his existence….until he surprised me with an apology I wasn’t expecting. I don;t know where he is but one thing I did learn is.. if your cocky, arrogant and self-centered I don’t want no parts of you..PERIOD!!

Mr. Confused – this person I had known for a very long time and he was a friend to one of my siblings. Yep I had a crush on him and he knew it but never said anything because of my sibling! Interesting thing is one of my parent’s ran into him and the first thing he asked was ” how was I doing” and one of my parent’s responded ” she is doing extremely well!” One of my parent’s stated that he said ” she was always the smart one and the one that got away.” What I learned is that if someone comes into your life, cherish them for the short moment that they are there because there is a possibility that you will never seen them again but you can always wish them the best!

Mr. Midget – this person was an experiment that went wrong…TERRIBLY WRONG! This was the first person I actually dated that was a few years younger than me. I had my fund but he had other plans that he never shared with me. End result…he got smart with me and I cussed him out royally! He called me names of course and I didn’t pay him any mind…all I really said was ” well you know it’s OK for girls to be short but you..your just a freak of nature!” was it a little harsh …yea but you didn’t hear the wack things he said. I learned is that you can’t push anyone to do something that they don’t wish to do…everyone has their options and you can’t get mad if they don’t go along with what you suggested…bang!

Mr. BF (Best Friend)- this guy I dated for a week and it didn’t feel right so we have been friends seems like forever. I really do not have anything bad to say about him because he is freakin awesome! He is very protective of me and I am glad to have him apart of my life. He watches my back whenever we are around each other and I can completely be myself! One thing I learned from him is that chivalry is not dead but only resides in a few good men ( nope not talkin about the movie!)

Mr. I Wish- this dude is extra special because he was younger than me but always felt he could hang with me. I am going to admit that I thought he was cute but never took him serious because he liked to joke around too much and never knew when to take him serious! Now, we talk every now and then I am glad that he is married and has children. It was nice to see him develop into a loving father and that he is being more serious his life!

Adult Years

Mr. Tattoo – this person was like someone I have never encountered before and was my completely opposite. The only thing we had in common was that we are both artist and skilled in the arts. He was Puerto Rican and that pretty much says it all…crazy aggressive and jealous! Lord I don’t know what I was thinking but we managed to make it work  somehow..just don’t ask! One thing I learned is that you can love someone so much you lose apart of yourself and really can’t get that back. Be careful what you say because you can never take it back and if your going to love, love all the way or nothing at all. One thing that shocked me was when he told me ” I changed his life and he is different now.” It shows how much power a positive person can have on another individual…spread more positivity around!

Mr. Marine – you know how people say that all marines are crazy…well…actually they are not and I was fortunate to date one for a short period of time. He was very loving, caring and understanding more calm than anybody I ever knew. We learned so much from each other but in the end he had to be deployed to Iraq and we lost contact. Fortunately, I don’t change my number that often and was able to get back in contact with him. We are still really good friends and we talk often. He truly is a diamond in the rough plus it helps that we are friends because he was a sniper and I damn sure don’t want him shooting me in the ass from 200 + yards away… I am just saying! LOL!

Mr. Teddy Bear – this person I spent at least 6 years with him and everyday was a learning experience. He was the definition of everything that was impossible that was made possible! He showed me how to love better and how to harder and I am always grateful for what he did for me. I am not going to lie I do think about him and wonder how he is doing but I do know he is doing well for himself. A part of me will always wonder but I do it was the best thing for use to go our separate ways since we were not on the same path anymore. Yes he was Puerto Rican but of a different kind!

Mr. Naked- this was very short lived because this person was hardly ever around but he had an issue with clothes..hence the name Mr. Naked! One thing is for certain I found him to be very entertaining and I learned how to be more of a free-spirit when it came to certain things..of course with clothes on! LOL!

Mr. I Need More – headache, headache..did I say headache!! he was the most needy person I have ever met. He was smart but did some of the dumbest things and I am looking at him like ” yo..are you serious..no one is that dense.” Thank God that period ran its course quick because 2 things could happen: 1) I was going to call the nut house or 2) I was going to throw something at him! One thing I learned is that you can never be scared to love no matter how many rough patches you hit…keep going!

Mr. 10gal Hat – there is so much that can be said about this person….quirky, weird, indecisive, funny, intelligent, crazy and very hard to read! Been knowing this person for quite sometime and some parts I get and some parts I don’t. He is never the one to speak on how he feels but damn sure doesn’t have a problem showing it! I am reminded by something someone said ” Everyone doesn’t have that ability to speak how they feel and be honest about it. They may need a little more time to develop that part of them.” I can agree to a certain extent…but seriously your an adult speak into the mic!! I think that if you can’t speak up on how you feel then you don’t have the ability to speak up on other things. Now I could be wrong but that is how I am seeing it. To be honest its just like the dude said in Berry Gordy’s The Last Dragon ” you gotta know the moves baby….you know the moves!”

Mr. Nicebutt – this guy I dated for a short time was my kickboxing instructor in NYC and I must say I did enjoy taking his class for a number of reasons. I mean hey if men can view women and check them out, women have the ability to do the same only difference is women are more smoother! It was nice to talk to him and eventually he took me out to lunch when Tavern on the Green was still located in Central Park. One thing I learned is that if you treat yourself good others will see that and treat you good as well. He had manners and pulled my chair out and if  I left the table he would stand up. There is something about a man that has manners and knows how to use them. I know that day he made his parents proud!

Mr. Dominican- this particular person was someone that I met in college, played softball with and had a class with. I saw him often and often admired him for his ability to play softball but I could always tell there was something more between us and its a shame we never spoke on it but he had a hell of a way of showing it! You know that look you give someone when your interested in them and you can see that kind of spark in their eye…yup you know exactly what I am talking about!! One thing I learned you can’t fight chemistry no matter how hard you try. It’s either there or it isn’t, if not you just have to take what you learn and go on.

Mr. Control – this person did seem like they had control issues but it eventually came out and of course I was like ” No Bueno”! This particular was an accomplished artist and appreciate the things that I had to offer but tried to be controlling and no one has time for that! I found his intelligence to be attractive and how he always tried to perfect his craft and had a undying yearning to learn more. One thing was for certain I learned what type of man or characteristic I do not want someone that is trying to control. You your role and as my 5-year old nephew Trent says ” your not getting in the game.” SMH!

Mr. Peruvian – now this dude was one of those crazy ass marines!! How I came across him was at a salsa club on the Lower East Side in Manhattan. He was interesting person but he was off his damn rocker! I swear he needed to be on medication or something. One thing I learned: No crazy men period!

Mr. Puerto Rico – this one I met on the 1 train in NYC and he happened to get on at West 72nd street! Did i stare him up and down..of course I did! Did I pretend that I wasn’t looking…absolutely not! Did I look away when he caught me staring at him….nope didn’t flex a muscle! When I got off the train I smiled and said ” hope you have a good day!” Funny how things happen..he got off the same stop and walked me up the stairs to West 59th. We talked briefly and I got his number..score!! He took me out for my birthday and I must say that was the absolute best…not only was he really good company but a hell of a salsa dancer! WEEEPPPAAA!! Sad part he had to go back to Puerto Rico but its the memories I will remember forever. One thing I learned that you should never judge a book by its cover and sometimes you just have to give some folks a chance!

Mr. Bee – its funny how I meet some interesting characters especially this one. My good girlfriend can vouch for me since she was the that was there with me. He was a little shorter than me ( it was ok I just like tall guys sorry…I am only 5’4!) We dated very briefly because he kept lying… first he had no kids and come to find out he did and he lived in a half way house,.,,say what!?!? Yea I quickly ended that crap! One thing I learned you can’t run from your past no matter how hard you try.

Mr. CA Love – this person was a little older than me but I learned some valuable lessons about being an adult, handling your business and really not caring what other people think. He showed me kindness, understanding, the definition of what a man can potentially be with the right woman  by his side. He always was honest with me and kept communication open. One thing I learned that some advice can come from the most unlikely source. Just like a special person said to me ” If you don’t need it throw it away, if it makes sense keep it.”

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